Universal questions of the millennium

I have questions:

• As the Republican presidential campaigns shambles toward Election Day,  when will good soldier John Boehner crack and start sobbing on TV?
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• Who will convince  Mitt Romney that the  presidency is  not an  entitlement?
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• Who will respond to comedian Lewis Black's appeal for someone to make his bathroom as white as the GOP convention that he viewed?
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• When a Romney strategist asserted that Mitt would Etch-a-Sketch after the primaries, was he referring to the 2016 primaries?
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• Would it at least help the economy with job creation if  the government made silver  spoons for  the  47 pct. of Americans whom he says won't take responsibilitiy for themselves?
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• Would you join an office pool  to predict the day when Rep. Darrell Issa will say something intelligent?
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• Will Josh Mandel ,  the Republican candidate for the senate,  tell us whether he was really   stationed in the Green Zone in Iraq.
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• When will Paul Ryan stop referring to Romney as his "running mate"?
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• Why won't the media ask Paul Ryan about the time he saw the North Pole from his front porch?
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• Am I the only person who doesn't  think Comedian Dennis Miller is funny?
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• When will Rush Limbaugh refer to all women as sluts?
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• How many wives is Mitt Romney permitted to have? 
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• Finally, will Mitt add an elevator for his dancing horses to his palatial home?  
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• And finally again: Wouldn't Mitt's life be a lot less complicated if he let H&R  Block  do his taxes?    

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