On MSNBC's "Morning Joe" show, crusading evangelist Franklin Graham would not flatly acknowledge that President Obama was a Christian. (Why am I writing this in 2012?) Graham said he doesn't know whether Obama has "accepted Jesus Christ" while adding something about Obama's Muslim father. As the startled panelists on the show stirred in disbelief, Graham said he was concerned that the president was more interested in looking after the welfare of Muslims than "Christians who are being murdered in Muslim countries." Subtle, huh?
Graham, the hyper-son of Billy Graham, has often spewed his religious doctrine but there was something well off the page in this morning's interview. He said he did know that Santorum was a Christian but wondered about Mitt Romney's Mormon faith as a downer. Still, whether it's Graham or Santorum and the other defenders of the faith, apocalyptic religious conservatism has taken control of portentous words and deeds.
Meanwhile, having failed in their efforts to poke around in America's bedrooms, the panting outriders in state legislatures are now focussing on something much more more specific: vaginal exploration.
In Virginia, for example, where vaginas commonly abound, the lawmakers - some of whom, it would be fair to assume, can testify to the efficacy of Viagra - are ready to declare victory over women's rights to privacy. As a companion to pending "personhood" anti-abortion legislation, the legislature is showing off its empowered masculinity. It is poised to pass an ultrasound law that mandates an often painful transvaginal probe before any abortion.
Yesterday a thousand protestors lined up in studied silence at the statehouse to express their dissent as the lawmakers headed to their sanctified offices inside.
I have a better idea to get these vaginal meddlers' undivided attention. It is Aristophanes' comedy, Lysistrata, in which the young Athenian woman assembled others from across Greece to deny their husbands sexual pleasure until their guys ended the Peloponnesian wars. Man, Viagra or no Viagra, it worked!
In today's religio-patriarchal climate, women need only to issue a warning that if you don't stop messing around with my body, you can sleep in another room. Then let nature take its course.