Readers of Grumpy Abe may recall that I recently announced my switch from liberal Democrat (as if you didn't know) to the Republican Party. I had anticipated coveted rewards with at least trial memberships to the white-guy clubs of my choice, an autographed copy of one of Ayn Rand's books, and possibly even a sit-down interview on Fox News to acknowledge my disaffection with tax-and-spend Democrats.
Never happened. Not a single invitation to lunch at Portage Country Club; No call from
Bill O'Reilly for a candid discussion of why it took so long for me to recognize the joyous glow of the GOP; no call from Wayne LaPierre offering a free six-week course in gun management; not even a release from exile to cover the Summit County Republican dinners.
In the end, my mounting disappointment in being shunned led me to say "to hell with it" and renounce my brief membership in the party of Lincoln (the auto, I mean), turn in my new black business suit, retrieve my valued old union membership card from the safe deposit box and return to my comfort zone in the Democratic Party where nobody minds if I spill pasta sauce on my faded shirt and wipe it with the table cloth. .
So excuse me for jumping ship to GOP waters in the first place. Everybody deserves a moment or two of madness in his or her life. (Sorry, Dad)