Sykes to Batchelder: Time to apologize

REP. BILL BATCHELDER has become so full of himself since he became the Ohio House Speaker that he simply cannot restrain himself from saying questionable things to friendly audiences - even when he might argue that it was all in fun. Republican fun, that is, at the expense of President Obama. (If, indeed, it was intended to be a side-splitter.)

According to the Washington Post, Batchelder told last week's Summit County GOP Lincoln Day Dinner crowd that Obama ought to be jailed. Ha!.Ha! Here are the words of his stand-up routine:

"The liberals are asking us to give Obama more time. And I think 25-to-life would be a good start."

Among those who didn't think the veteran Speaker's remarks were funny was Rep. Vernon Sykes, Akron Democrat, who called them " absolutely deplorable. I call on the Speaker to apologize for such distasteful remarks immediately".

Sorry, Vern, but that's not at all likely. The current gang of Republicans often finds ways to show disrespect to the generic presidency with vitriol ranging from calling Obama a liar as he addressed Congress to the in-your-face finger-pointing outburst from Arizona Gov. Jan Brewer. Or slamming him as a threat to American security. (How quickly they forgot Osama.)

You can expect a lot more of this sort of political porn in the months leading to the election from the party's hood ornaments operating in a distant universe. Unfortunately, gravitas is not one of the GOP's strong points.

Moon landings, trees, and Santorum's multiple choices

AS YOU MIGHT KNOW by now, my eyes wonder off the page in my dedicated efforts to comprehend the remarks of the current Republican herd of presidential McElephants. It happened when Newt Gingrich predicted he would stage a moon landing - in his second term! Cognizance was further abused when Mitt Romney told a Chamber of Commerce group in Michigan that one of the big reasons he loved his native state was that its trees were the "right height". (As one who lives among trees, I can tell you that I instantly checked ours for arborial equality and conceded there must be another way to express your love of your community.

Now comes Rick Santorum to the Summit County Lincoln Day Dinner to bestir the usual suspects - the party's enduring glitterati at these annual affairs. If I read the Beacon Journal account correctly - and possibly I didn't - he gave us a multiple choice of the same theme in the first five or six paragraphs.

No. 1. "America doesn't need a president it can believe in."

No.2. "We've always succeeded when we have a president who believe in them." (Them?)

No. 3. "That is what this election is all about. Who do you believe in?" (Them? Us? Me?)

In fairness, I should add the hometown Republican crowd reportedly gave him a standing ovation, although I'm not sure whether it was for No. 1, 2 or 3.The guests also gave him a 74 pct. triumph in a predictable straw poll.

Meanwhile, oddly enough, the county's party chairman, Alex Arshinkoff, who was seated next to Santorum, never appeared in the BJ account - another first for such festive political occasions. The thrill of announcing a meaningless straw poll was left to Bryan Williams, former county Elections Board director and now a Santorum booster.

Arshinkoff did tell me that as a matter of traditional party policy neither he nor the party would endorse anybody until the nominee is chosen at the convention. Politically speaking, that much caution I could understand. It's still February, folks.

Mike DeWine: The line forms on the RIGHT

STOP THE PRESSES! Focus the TV cameras. Yep, that's Ohio Atty. Gen. Mike DeWine, a pol for all seasons, who endorsed Rick Santorum as they male-bonded in Columbus. DeWine, who had been a Romney man after being a Pawlenty man, decided it was time for a new winner's circle now that it's clear that the Tea Partiers have little use for McMitt. Besides, DeWine and Santorum have long shared their roles as custodians of The Faithful.

This will doubtless mean more for DeWine's ego than for Santorum's success or failure. Such out-of-the-blue (red?) but politically convenient conversions mean very little or anything on the morning-after. (Is DeWine aiming for a veep spot on the Santorum national ticket? Or maybe U.S. attorney general?)

You might ask Donald Trump about endorsements. 'Twas an odd moment when The Donald stood with McMitt before the cameras and tweaked Romney's candidacy with a magisterial endorsement. Today, Trump is puzzling over the numbers and muttering "I just don't understand it." (Not that he ever did.)

All of which is a reminder that DeWine had belabored his campaign promise to end Obamacare on the first morning he entered the AG office. That was in 2010, a nightmarish year for Democrats all-around when DeWine fluked out a win over one of the most competent fellows to rise in Ohio, Richard Cordray. If that sounds like an exaggeration, recall that the same Mike DeWine was, as an incumbent Republican senator, thrashed in a landslide by current Democratic Sen. Sherrod Brown in 2006.

Need more? Is it nothing more than a coincidence that DeWine's about-face occurred just before Santorum's appearance at the Summit County Republican Lincoln Day dinner Saturday night? DeWine will be on the dais with him and Mike's buddy, Alex Arshinkoff, who used to do errands for him in Northern Ohio. The icing on the after-dinner sweets will be doubly sugary.

If the sky is clear, you might even see a halo over the city.