Bobby Jindal, a potential Republican presidential candidate in 2016, thinks his party should stop being stupid. That's what he told the slamfest of the Republican Natiional Committee meeting in Charlotte. "We've got to stop being the stupid party," is what he asserted to his stupid audience as the keynote speaker.
His words so stupified some of the stupid committeemen that a couple of them met later over pitchers of empowering Gatorade and declared Jindal as being stupid for calling them stupid in his stupid version of Jindal Bells.
Indeed, one of the members' wives, who tagged along to carry her stupid husband's luggage, even thought it was inappropriate for the stupid Louisiana governor to ruin a nice break from the routine to take some stupid tours of Charlotte - all underwritten by the host city.
One delegate even confronted Jindal, eyeball to eyeball, and blurted: "You're stupid!'
To which Jindal replied, "No, sir, you're stupid!"
"No, you're stupid, governor!"
That playground exchange lasted a good 20 minutes before they thought it would help if they took a break from the hostilities to slip over to the Gatorade bar for a stupid nightcap. (Real men actually need Gatorade as a cheap high for their testosterone.)
Frankly, we don't know what the fuss is all about. Two of the party's deepest thinkers tried to rally them with good news. George Will , who is best remembered for his stupid TV prediction that Romney would win in a landslide, assured stupid Republicans that President Obama's inaugural speech was nothing more than stupid "rhetorical cotton candy - sugary and mostly air''. Conservatism, he argued,. is alive and well - no matter the polls that show Obama and Americans aligned on major issues.
Paul Ryan, the stupid vice presidential loser, was once again upbeat, scrubbing pots and pans that had already been scrubbed, and declaring that if given half a chance, stupid Republicans will show they can govern despite the stupid outcome of the November election.
When last seen, all of the stupid committeemen went out and cracked open another keg of Gatorade.
Even Mitt Romney stupidly declared elsewhere that he will be back.
Moral: Stupid is as stupid does. Did we really need Bobby Jindal to tell us that?
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1 comment:
If the Republican Party stopped being stupid, would there be anyone left to vote for its candidates?
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