From Trayvon "justice" to Frog Jump, Tenn.

Maybe it's the tropical heat that followed a couple of weeks of rain that is causing a lot of public figures to say the strangest things these days.   Let me try to sort it out:

The post- Zimmerman trial has produced  talk of books and rumors of books to be written.   Not unusual.  Every national spectacle always  lures a wannabe author or two to tell you much of what you already know or don't really care to know. If there is to be a cash-conscious literary circus, someone should at least note the pointed words of Zimmerman defense lawyer Mark O'Mara, who paused long enough during his victory lap to remark that if Trayvon Martin's assailant had been black, he wouldn't have been arrested. Oh?

O'Mara didn't realize that he had just blown  another hole in the justice system.  If a black had killed Trayvon, why wouldn't he have been arrested?  Was the young black victim's death less important depending on the skin color of the person who killed him?    And if those are society 's acceptable rules for a justice system, where's the justice?  And what if a black had murdered a white?  In some quarters in the wake of the outrageous verdict  it would be asked why we even needed a trial to administer black-on-white  justice.

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In the lead-up to the deal that confirmed Richard Cordray,   John McCain told us with a straight face that the problem could be solved if the president let Republicans make the nominations. Although Republicans said they liked Cordray but hated the Consumer Financial Protection Bureau that he manages, I think they also resented Cordray because he is intelligent.  Intellectual depth has never been helpful to politicians.  Otherwise Cordray, a former "Jeopardy" champ, would not have lost to Atty. Gen. Mike DeWine.  Way back, Jack Gilligan, another whiz, would not have been defeated by Jim Rhodes for Ohio governor.  I won't even mention George W.Bush's twin victories for president.

About McCain's pro-choice idea for his party:   I'm told he even agreed to sweeten it for the other side  by calling it Nominees for Democrats and encoding the names of the GOP choices in the Congressional Pledge of  Allegiance.

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Ever hear of Frog Jump, Tenn.   Probably not.  It's not even listed on the Google map.  It's an unincorporated place near Elmore,  if that helps. It's also known as "Lightning Bug Center". (Trust me: I couldn't make this up.)

We call all of this to your sober attention because it is the home of a farmer named Stephen Fincher, a Republican  who has a well-fed place in Congress.  He recently voted to eliminate food stamps from the big agriculture bill on Biblical grounds.  He says he was prompted by a verse in Thessalonians  quoting Jesus as warning that anybody unwilling to work "should not eat."

Rep. Fincher, however, can enjoy eating to his  belly's content inasmuch as he's received about $3.5 million in federal farm subsidies.

Maybe he can at least reenact the fishes and the loaves for the poor.

Arshinkoff to Coughlin: Banana or orange?

Every now and then a precedent-setting moment occurs at an otherwise boring Summit County Board Elections Board meeting that could have a strong influence on how the Republican Party profiles color-coded  people to deny then a vote.

As reported by the Beacon Journal, it happened when Summit County Republican Chairman Alex Arshinkoff, a board member, demanded that his old adversary, Kevin Coughlin,  produce a party-ID.  Coughlin, the Republican ex-state senator, was being screened as a nonpartisan candidate for Stow Municipal Clerk.

Arshinkoff, as is his wont, went directly to the gravity of the matter by asking Coughlin:  "Are you a banana or an orange?"

Well, now.  When was any politician ever  asked a provocative question like that? (For his part Coughlin said it didn't matter.)

There was a time back in the 12th Century when one might have been asked whether he or she was a Ghibelline or a Guelph, a life or death matter at the time. Or  a Hatfield or McCoy.  Or a Rino or Defender of the Faith.

But a  banana or orange from the guy who has long considered himself to be the county party's Top Banana since the days of U.S. Grant.?

We can only assume that the idea of such juicy metaphors was seeded in Arshinkoff's subconscience years ago when a disrespectful Beacon Journal editor referred to him as a "cumquat".  Alex didn't like the sound of the word even though he didn't know what it meant.

But be ready for a new line of questioning the next time you show up at  the polls.  If you are neither a banana nor an orange nor even a cumquat, be prepared  to spend long hours trying to define yourself as an ordinary voter.  For your convenience, a trash bin will be provided for the peelings and rinds.

P.S.  Whatever he is, Coughlin was denied a spot on the ballot.

Taking GOP imagination to the next level in North Carolina

Have you noticed that the GOP,  forever known as the Party of Ideas, still has plenty left in its tank in North Carolina?  In a uniquely progressive approach to show the ladies who's boss in the abortion battle, the sovereign white guys in the state senate  finessed Planned Parenthood and other maladjusted groups  by passing a strict anti-abortion bill sneakily attached  as an amendment to a measure opposing Sharia Law.   That was followed by a similar amendment slipped into a motorcycle safety bill in the House.  With more states considering abortion bills, it's now being reliably reported that other  Defenders of their Faith plan to ban the celebration of  Adolph Hitler Day in America, a brilliantly clever step  in smuggling more anti-abortion laws into the books.

Political life can be odd, if not always beautiful.

Let me try to sort out a few mostly odd odds and ends this week:

When Joseph Palazzo, the former tech director of the Cuyahoga Heights School District, was convicted of stealing $3.4 million from the schools, the Plain Dealer reported, Palazzo apologized  to U.S.District Judge Benita Pearson and declared that he had suffered a "lapse in judgment" and would never do it again.  Given that he was sentenced to 11 years and four months in a Federal prison, it would have to be awhile.

The PD also told us of Allen Warner's day in court for "secretly recording nude images of two former mistresses and a teenage grirl  using cameras hidden  in clocks and video players.

The 60-year-old voyeur,who apologized, told the court he had no idea he was doing anything wrong..  The court thought otherwise and sentenced Warner to a 17 year-hitch  for "voyeurism, pandering  sexually oriented material involving a minor and pornography related crimes".

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It was a better week for GOP  Reps. Michele Bachmann and Louie Gohmert, and a terrible one for Congressman Paul Broun, the nutty Georgia Republican. Bachmann once lamented that if the rascals in the White House continued to assault the wallets of Americans, some day "there won't be any rich people in America."  She can relax.  Several reliable sources have now reported that people with assets of more than $1 million soared  more than 11 pct.  in 2012 in North America, a continent in first place on the planet with $12.7 trillion in assets.

I needn't remind you that I have long considered Gohmert, the Texas guy, to be the perennial claimant to the congressional dunce cap.  No longer.  It is now claimed by Broun, an MD, who has never stopped Biblically ranting about the evils of science.  He has again told us of the planet's twin-evils: evolution and the big bang theory.

"God's word is true," says Dr. Broun.  "...All that stuff I was taught about evolution and embryology and the big bang theory, all that is from  the pit of hell.  It's lies to try to keep me and all the folks who were taught that from understanding that they need a savior."  (Or. at least Broun, whichever comes first in politics.) Yadayadayada. ..  Move over,  Louie. Don't think you can top this for now.

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Finally, I've figured out the heart of the congressional wingies' opposition to humane immigration reform.  They simply don't like Latinos. No way.

As for the abortion controversy,  I propose that we contact our congressmen to support  a law that serves two purposes:  Any congressmen who will be voting to restrict abortions must first present a photo ID - a photo ID  - to determine whether there is a tell-tale  scar from  a birth controlling vasectomy.  Those who fail the exam  will be barred from going to a Major League baseball game to watch a team with more than two  Latino players. Problem solved.

A troubling report from Plunderbund:

We offer this guest column from Plunderbund.com:

Springboro’s Revisionist American History Class Has Not Been Canceled

by Joseph on July 10, 2013 · Leave a Comment

Last week we reported that the Springboro Public School District was planning to host a series of courses on the U.S. Constitution developed by a group with ties to white supremacists, using materials developed by a couple of guys who believe the Bible should supplant US law.

On July 4th, the Dayton Daily News (DDN) reported that the class had been cancelled. The paper said registrants for the course, offered by the Institute on the Constitution, should contact Ricki Pepin at the Institute “for a refund.”

An email obtained by Plunderbund shows that Pepin has not actually cancelled the class but has instead moved it to a new day and location.

According to the email (below), Ms. Pepin will be teaching the class starting a week later once a new location is identified.   Ms. Pepin attributes the move to “a bump in the road”, which would more accurately be described as an overwhelmingly negative response from an outraged community.

Pepin’s website advertises her as a speaker focused on the “Contemporary application of Biblical Principles” through a process she labels “Educated activism”.  Her lectures aim to teach American History ”from a Biblical foundation”.  She is the author of two books “The Apocalypse! Unveiling of the End Times” and “God’s Health Plan”.

While the class will no longer be held on school property, the class was originally advertised in a flyer mailed to parents and staff by Ashley McGuire, Secretary to Superintendent Todd Petrey, using her official Springboro School District email account.

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Never too late for payback by a deceased Browns fan

OK, fun time from a Columbus Dispatch obituary:

When long time Cleveland Browns fan Scott Entsminger died in Mansfield, his obit airily included his reputed last words: "(Scott) respectfully requests six Cleveland Browns pall bearers so the Browns can let him down one last time."

His brother Bill explained that the Browns line was an inside joke in their family. "We had knocked that around before," Bill said. "It was nudge-nudge, wink-wink, whichever one of us goes first".

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Jim Petro joins the pro- gay-marriage cause

Stop whatever's left of the presses.  Another well-known Ohio Republican has experienced an  epiphany arising from his family.  Following  Sen. Rob Portman's defense of same-sex marriage because his son is gay, former Ohio auditor and attorney general Jim Petro announced today  that he, too, supports gay marriage.  Here's  his statement to a news conference:

Last year, my daughter Corbin married Jessica Gelman in Massachusetts, where same-gender marriages are legal.  They are expecting a child soon, and deserve the same protections guaranteed to other families.  Seeing their happiness, and realizing all the rights they would be denied here in Ohio has proven to me the importance of equal marriage in our state"

Referring to FreedomOhio's  grass-roots initiative for an amendment to kill the gay marriage ban in the Ohio, Petro said;

"I'm thoroughly convinced that bringing marriage equality to Ohio is the right thing to do.  This amendment is rooted in a central conservative value, namely, freedom - the freedom to love, the freedom  of religion, and the freedom from big government.  I am proud to endorse the amendment."

Good,  Jim Petro!

Perhaps it will lead other prominant Republicans to shed their own enmity to the social values that are rapidly changing these days.  There are doubtless other social conservatives  faced with offspring (or their closeted selves) who could  step forward.  And at the local level, every county GOP chairman, the field hands of the people in power in Columbus,  needs to address the question.   So what about it, Alex Arshinkoff?  It's 2013, you know.

By the way, Phil Burress, the head of Citizens for Community Values (a conservative Cincinnati group that germinates in southwest Ohio) hissed that Petro has no right to impose his own family values on others.   Hey, Phil.  Isn't it the other way around?  Thought so.

Robart boasts of his Cuyahoga Falls mission in ...Fairlawn!

The oddest entry in  Fairlawn's  Fourth of July parade was a  big truck with an accordion billboard promoting Cuyahoga Falls Mayor Don Robart.  It told us that the long serving Republican was "always putting  Cuyahoga Falls  first".

A rather strange boast, don't you think,  in a Fairlawn event where the local mayor, Bill Roth, is a low-key Republican  in a well-managed town.

In recent years, Robart, who is seeking his 8th term in November, has swung  over to the Tea Party wing, if not as a card-carrying member, then as a kindred  spirit.  He showed up at the teabaggers Rescue America Tax Day Rally in the Falls last year (Another of those events with a do-gooder  name) to praise the GOP insurgents as the conscience of America. Still, he's not been  reluctant to take federal money for his own projects.

He also stonewalled giving a wounded Iraqi veteran  and his male partner family rates at the Falls Natatorium. In this instance,  the mayor decided that gay couples  come second to putting his city first. So it  seems fair` to ask:  First in what?

Now after three decades in City Hall, he's being challenged by a popular Democratic councilman, Don Walters. It won't be surprising to see more of those Robart Falls-first trucks in the Labor Day parade in Barberton.  Maybe even Canton.

The GOP CAN keep them down on the farm

A few people (probably Republicans) have  wondered why I frequently refer to the
GOPers running the Ohio legislature as "rustics". Being old-fashioned enough to believe that a picture is worth a thousand words, I again refer to the official photo logo adorning the top of every official press  release from the Ohio Republican Party as the symbol of the party of regressives.   I don't see a single skyline of an Ohio city nor an urban thoroughfare.    Simply a barn and silo.  Tell me that "rustic" doesn't befit the ordinary Republican politicians, even the ones who live in Upper Arlington or Hudson.

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Speaking of the Ohio legislature, the GOP sausage machine that   ground out the new budget also produced some of the  oddest defenses that edge out the best of  Texas Rep. Louie Gohmert,  today's gold standard of loony  utterances.   There was Rep. Ron Hood, the Ashville, Oh. Republican who introduced an abortion bill in mid-June that was augmented in the final hour as a  budget amendment.  Referring to the American Cancer Society's  rejection of the notion that abortion leads to breast cancer, Hood said he didn't think these issues needed to be stated as fact. Only, he said, as a possibility. Or not.

Then along came Rep.  Terry Boose, the Norwalk Republican, insisting that a state budget is a statement of numbers, not top-heavy policy.  But Democratic Sen. Tom Sawyer of Akron would have nothing to do with that kind of talk that stresses  numbers over policy.  "He doesn't know what he's talking about," Sawyer said. "The budget is 80 pct. policy and 20 pct. numbers".  Right.  Working from the same column of numbers, the budgeteers will find a way to inject their own policies. (Remember the adage that figures don't lie, but liars do figure!)

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Dear me. My copy of the Beacon Journal arrived Monday morning without a single word about the budget that Gov. Kasich signed (as a guy thing, no less) on Sunday evening.    The Plain Dealer, however, nicely filled the vacuum with a long piece that topped the front page.  So how much longer can the BJ sustain its motto of Informing Engaging Essential?  I'm not awaiting a reply.

Gonidakis wins the non-sequitur award for the Great Budget of 2013

The murky logic that attended  the governor's signing of the Great Budget of 2013 in Columbus Sunday night made it  somewhat of a challenge to isolate the best non-sequitur for posterity.  But we finally settled on this one from Ohio Right to Life's leader, Michael Gonidakis:

"It took great compassion and courage for our governor and pro-life  legislature to stand up to the abortion  industry that blatantly pressured them."

C'mon, Mike.   I would blatantly remind you that as a buddy of the governor who appointed you to the Ohio Medical Board,  you've been quoted  in  everything but the Major League box scores on your  aggressive support of the Draconian anti-abortion language  in the budget, even to the point of scary tactics about the cancerous illnesses  -not medically supported - that accompany abortion. Now that you've prevailed, don't you think it would be a greater act of compassion and courage for you  to recant  your self-serving  apocalyptic vision?

P.S. Your quote did manage to wind up on the Huffington Post, which cast more shame on Ohio at the national level by describing the approved anti-abortion  amendment in Ohio  as "among the most restrictive in the country."