Be patient, Issa says. You may win the lottery someday

IF YOU ARE serious about finding a reason to support the Bush tax cuts for the wealthy, you might want to consider as good a reason as any from Rep. Darrell Issa, a fringe Republican from California. Rising to the challenge in the Fox News Echo Class, Issa said that it would be important to any of us if we happened to win a lottery. Said Issa: "One of the things that you lose in the debate is most people don't make over a quarter million dollars a year. But a great many people once in their lifetime will sort of win the lottery." Cool. Tell me when it's my turn.

Issa, who made a fortune in the auto security business, is the richest man in Congress with a piggy bank of $250 million. According the ThinkProgress, if the GOP takes over the House of Representatives, he would be chairman of the Oversight and Government Reform Committee. His early agenda would include investigations of the U.S. Post Office Department and ACORN, despite the fact that the community organizing operation has already been scrutinized inside out on a bipartisan basis. He will also be raising more questions about President's Obama's birth, reports ThinkProgress, as well as whether his parents were ever married. All of this has the the makings of still another Republican presidential candidate. Although he represents a very conservative district that includes part of San Diego, he actually was born in Cleveland (I haven't seen his birth certificate) and attended the Kent State University Stark campus for awhile. He's s rich, kooky pol but the kind of guy who will make his party proud even though very few of us will ever hold that big winning lottery ticket.

DeWine: Bland speech, tiny audience: Recipe for disaster

WELL, IT has to be called a train wreck for the candidate and for his host. I refer to Mike DeWine's solo (in nearly more ways than one!) appearance at the Akron Press Club luncheon Tuesday. DeWine, as you may know, is the former Republican senator who is trying to unseat Ohio Atty. Gen. Richard Cordray in November. Speaking almost inaudibly, head down, into his prepared text, DeWine wanted to leave us with the the notion that as attorney general, he would provide "leadership" and would "do better." At least, that's what I think he said. He also opined that the Tea Party had brought into the system "a lot of people passionate about politics." Right.

He reminded the sparse audience (fewer than 35!) which included a few Cordray aides, (one of whom filmed what there was of the speech) and DeWine's wife Fran, that being an unyielding defender of the law and the Constitution, he would file suit against ObamaCare because he considers it unconstitutional. He also attacked Cordray for a sloth-like work of BCI, the state crime lab - delays that have since been dismissed by such independent sources as the Plain Dealer's PolitiFact/Ohio.

DeWine had turned down a Press Club invitation to debate. If he had been the futurist that he claims to be, he would have also rejected the later Press Club offer to let him speak alone. It was an embarrassingly inertial moment for some of the folks. and it could be felt hovering in the dead air. (Cordray, accepted the Press Club's debate invitation, and had to settle for his own solo appearance on Oct. 7.)

He did score a first, however. The skimpy crowd was the smallest audience for a statewide candidate since the Club started sponsoring debates at least a decade ago. Even his former part-time employe, Summit County Republican Chairman Alex Arshinkoff didn't show up for his ex-paymaster. Nor was there a table reserved for Republicans, which was the chairman's call in the past. Tsk. Tsk.

Ok, the event wasn't a total loss. Dewine passed out his wife' s recipe booklet - "Fran DeWine's Family Favorites" - before heading to the lecturn. Besides recipes, that booklet prominently showed his wide-ranging belief in God, Mother and Country. The back of the booklet featured a photo of Mike and his wife, an American flag and what might be mistaken for a religious leaded window. Actually it depicted blind justice.

It couldn't have been more unsettling for the candidate, what with the rain outside and chill in the room.

FOOTNOTE: It was a troubling day of setbacks for the DeWine campaign. The Ohio Tea Party PAC had just announced its endorsement of one of its own, AG candidate Robert Owens of the Constitution Party; the Dayton Daily News, the newspaper in DeWine's Southern Ohio neighborhood, endorsed Cordray, saying the case for him was "overwhelming"' and the Toledo Blade hardly mentioned DeWine in editorially supporting Democrat Cordray for his "honesty and dedication."

GOP's old contract born again as a pledge .

HOW TO YOU LIKE THAT? I had long left Newt Gingrich's Contract with America for dead, but after all of these years along comes the Republicans' Pledge to America. Alas, as presented to us by John Boehner in between his golf outings via corporate jets, it would have been easy enough to confuse it with that spray-on polish that brightens your furniture. As some observers have quickly pointed out, it was another superficial wipe-on to clean up a political culture that thrives on earmarks, taxing the rich and relieving hospital emergency rooms of unfortunate folks without health insurance.

Why, beyond the normal excesses of political rhetoric, does Boehner insist on dragging out the GOP's well-worn notions - a 'manifesto" says Rupert Murdock's Wall Street Journal - to bamboozle the public into believing it is on the fast track to prosperity? Largely it is a party so eager to regain power that it can only do so by cooking the figures - a tactic that it holds dearly.

Not being one of the party's mathematicians, I keep waiting for someone to explain how you can cut billions in taxes, balance the budget and live happily ever after. Nobody can. That's the beauty of the magic polish to give new life to a party myth that is as old as a mature olive tree. This pledge is nothing more than a cynical revival by GOP politicians in empty suits who won't have a clue once they get into office to spend more time with their lobbyists. As for Boehner, who is commonly known as the leading recipient of perks from well-positioned lobbyists (R.J. Reynolds, MillerCoors, etc.) he can ill-afford to ignore the fattest cats if he wants them to continue to host his pleasure outings and ritzy hotels.

He had better get the job done. There's also another coalition of rightwing outfits with names like FreedomWorks, Liberty Control and Tea Party 365, that is up and running as the "Contract from America." Honest. With America? From America? To America? With so many

maniacal Tea Party bleaters running for office today, we can only hope that when the New House of Representatives begins its labors to, say, abolish health care and move the government to Birmingham or Hilton Head Island, the next proclamation won't more accurately be a Contract After America - after, that is, the neo-anarchists take over.

Cash for Clunkers: Which Ganley do you believe?

REPUBLICAN TOM GANLEY, the candidate who refused an invitation from the Akron Press Club to debate U.S. Rep. Betty Sutton, may find that he can't avoid another debate: With himself. That awkward challenge arose in a Plain Dealer PolitiFact/Ohio piece noting that auto dealer Ganley has been slamming the Cash for Clunkers program as a worthless government initiative led by Sutton because "not one job did it create." But the PD reported that a year ago there was a completely different Tom Ganley with effusive praise for the program in a Warner Cable interview by host Tom Conklin.

Let's roll back the tape, in which he declared:

"Once again, the government was searching for ways to stimulate our economy and create jobs. And I'm sure you read General Motors is going to a second shift in Lordstown because of this. That creates jobs; it also creates taxpayers. They are bringing back something close to 1,300 jobs we've stimulated through the Cash for Clunkers. Plus, I have created jobs out of necessity in my stores because of the large volume of folks coming. We are bringing back people that we had laid off."

The paper reported that during the Clunkers period, Ganley's 32 dealerships sold 934 cars worth $20.6 million. Reporter Sabina Eaton said that after reviewing the facts, she concluded that "Ganley clearly changed his tune. We rate his gymnastics to be a Full Flop."

Amateur politician that he is, do you think it's time for him to give himself a seasonal Tuneup?

P.S.: He has now agreed to be a soloist at the Press Club on Oct. 26. Sutton will be there on Oct. 2o.

Care to take your chances on toxic drinking water supplies

DID YOU NOTICE the news article that said Wingfoot Lake and a couple of Geauga County reservoirs have been put under advisories for high levels of toxins? The problems - which have not yet reached Akron's drinking water supply - turned up in warnings from the Ohio Department of Health , Department of Natural Resources and Environmental Protection Agency. Knowing how much conservatives hate government, do you think we should we simply get rid of water testing and take our chances? Just asking.

Sarah Sharia Palin: What's in a name?

SARAH PALIN, the Republicans' self-enthroned Earth Mother, threw in the H-word in an interview with Fox's Greta Van Susteren the other night. It wasn't a slip of the tongue. When Sarah Palin says Barack Hussein Obama, her motive is clear. You know, Hussein. Saddam. Enemy. Cognitively leap to Iran now. Muslim. Mosque. Manhattan. 9/11. Obama. Kenya. Birthplace. Liberal. Nazi. Dictator. Socialist. Obama. Hamas apologist. Sharia. Etc.

Nice going, Sarah. But it's a game that anybody can play. So I will. It occurs to me that this time she is living on the edge with the president's middle name: Hussein. As one who enjoys a bout with scramble words, I have decided that Sarah's middle name has to be encoded Sharia, the Muslim's sacred law. Oh?

If you unscramble the word, it appears as "I, Sarah." What more evidence do you need that she is a closet terrorist? ( Well, actually not very closeted.) Having been assigned to a cryptology course during my Air Force days, I've spent years hoping that someday it would pay off. It just did. Careful Sarah Sharia Palin!

Sen Voinovich: Asking us to live by myth alone?

WHAT'S THAT? Our Sen. George Voinovich says he will oppose the Don't Ask, Don't Tell repeal until he hears what our military leaders have to say about it. That's the old "we need more information to make a responsible decision"' dodge before we leap recklessly into things like health care and financial reforms and now gay and lesbian soldiers. As one who has chronicled the political class for many years , I would call Voinovich's retreat from a decision as a definite NO.

I know life for a senator can get pretty clotted these days to distract them from any details of an issue that has been debated for too long. But to sit and wait for word from the military leaders? Inasmuch as Secretary of Defense Robert Gates and Joint Chiefs Chairman Adm. Mike Mullen have both said the discriminatory system should be repealed, I wonder what military leaders Voinovich is trying to access. Pope Julius II, the so-called "Warrior Pope" who never needed much encouragement to suit up for battle? Richard the Lionhearted, the venerable if ill-advised crusader? Snoopy's Red Baron?

Sorry, senator. Isn't it time that cohesive Republicans like yourself stop asking all us to live by myth alone?

In Colorado, three's a crowd to bankruptcy

IF YOU CAN endure still one more nightmarish reminder of the reckless zealotry of the anti-tax crowd , pay close attention to Colorado, folks. There are three measures on the November ballot that are making even conservative Republicans out there fidgety, to say the least. Promoted by a posse of right-wingers that appears to be a on joy ride to hell, the issues would leave the Rocky Mountain State in an ocean of debt with no remedy for paying it off. But one of the big issues in this year's elections is that proposed remedies by the tax-killers (i.e., services killers) are nowhere to be found.

One of the measures would cut property taxes and force the state to cover the loss of money for education. Another would shrink the state income tax rate and cut certain fees. According to the New York Times, there's research that says Colorado would lose $2.1 billion if the three issues pass with no plan to make up the difference. Virtually all of the state's general fund would be swallowed whole to pay for education. (Alas, some of this cliff-hanging is occurring in the Ohio races, too.)

Naturally, the rabid sponsors do not foresee hopeless chaos resulting from this nonense. One is quoted in the Times as justifying their efforts with no apologies. "The establishmnent fears our grass-roots petitions" she said, "because they benefit everyone, not just the insiders."

Oh? I don't know the state that well, so I would merely ask whether only the insiders send their kids to schools, get protection from safety forces and have snow-cleared highways in winter.

Such mindlessness is showing in various ways across the country but in this instance it finally has Democrats and Republicans agreeing that, if successful, the ballot issues would virtually leave Colorado for dead.

It leaves me with the thought that when this crowd of anti-Obama, anti-tax, anti-everything eventually passes from the scene and takes Christine O'Donnell, Sharron Angle and Rand Paul with them, they will leave behind no intellectual history.

Beware the hermit crabs in the political class

THE LATE A.J. LIEBLING, the iconoclastic journalist and acerbic critic of newspapers, once described two Columbus papers housed under the same roof as "two hermit crabs living in the same shell." That also seems to be the crabby case now with the former Republican Party and its Tea Party proprietor that have been clawing the Obama Administration. In their meteoric rise, the TP's have shared time, space and manic attacks on their Democratic victims as well as bashing some of the programs that have been around for more than three-quarters of a century. For example, Social Security.

While many Republican pols find ways to lessen the political consequences of an all-out appeal for ending the program that has served countless millions of retirees, the Tea Partiers toss it into the same stew as, say, street cleaning or 4th of July fireworks. If it comes from the government (i.e., taxpayers) , it has got to go. Some of the very same pols even quietly deny that they are in accord with their Tea Party friends on all counts and that neither occupant of the shell really wants to deprive us of monthly Social Security payments. That's baloney, of course., that only the Fox News culture would have us believe.

I would excuse some Tea Partiers who only know what they heard from Glenn Beck or Sarah Palin. But if you want to know what they are really thinking, pay attention to Dick Armey, the former Texas congressman and bloated chairman of FreeomWorks, whose comfort zone is squarely in the Tea Party base. In an interview with ThinkProgress at a Tea Party rally in Chicago, Armey declared that Social Secruity was a "corrupt goverment practice" and a "pay-as-your-go Ponzi scheme."

Such damning seems to come easily for a person of Armey's means who would live very well, thank you, without those monthly checks. Trouble is, such calculated madness has taken root in a lot of people for whom Social Security, Medicare and other forms for federal assistance are literally keeping them alive these days. W hen the wealthiest among us pretend to empathize with folks living on the edge, what hope is there for a level playing field in this year's elections?

When is Federal money not Federal money? Ask Robart

What's wrong with this picture? Cuyahoga Falls Mayor Don Robart showed up at the Tea Party rally in his town Saturday to renew his vows of loyalty as one of the mad-as-hell right-wing opponents of federal spending. And yet...

Only a day before, the Beacon Journal reported that Susan Truby, Falls community development director, was appreciative of a $780,000 federal stimulus grant to buy and rehab six homes whose mortgages had been foreclosed., "This creates a great deal of of positive community relations in the neighborhood," she said. Cool. Even the name of Don L. Robart, Mayor, plainly appears on a yard sign in front of one of the homes hailing the program.